Date Rape

Rapists are not always strangers. When someone you know – a date, steady boyfriend, or casual friend forces you to have sex, it is still rape.

Acquaintance Rape: any non-consensual sexual activity between 2 or more people who know each other.

The facts: On college campuses:

  • 60% of all rape victims
  • 1 in 4 women are victims of rape,know their assailants
  • 84% of those women knew their
  • 92% of adolescent rape assailant Victims know their assailants
  • 57% of those rapes happened on a date
Hughes, J.O. and Sandler, B.R., Friends Raping Friends –Could It Happen to You? , Project on the Status and Education of Women, 1987.
Acquaintance Rape: When the Rapist is Someone You Know , written and published by the Illinois Coalition Against Sexual Assault, 1990


Risk Factors

Male Characteristics and Behaviors
  • Disrespectful speech or actions
  • Socially inappropriate behavior
  • Domineering or controlling behavior
  • Acting dishonestly or inconsistently
  • Belief in rape myths
  • Irresponsibility
  • Hostility toward women
Female Risk Factors
  • Sense of vulnerability
  • Overlooking discomfort
  • Overlooking warning signs
  • Irresponsibility
  • Idealizing men
  • Alcohol abuse
Situational Characteristics

  • Isolated or unfamiliar environment
  • Women dependent on men for transportation
  • Man initiates and/or pays
  • Alcohol and /or other drug abuse
Carter, C. (ed), The Other Side of Silence , Gilson, N.H.: Avocus Publishing, 1995

Being Safe with Acquaintances

  • Trust your gut. If you don’t feel comfortable in a situation, leave it.
  • Take care of yourself. Don’t put yourself in a situation where other people might have to take care of you, because there might not be there.
  • Be careful when inviting someone into your home, or going to someone else’s home. These are the places that most acquaintance rapes occur.
  • Communicate with your partner. Be firm, don’t send mixed messages, be clear with your partner what you are comfortable doing.
  • Be aware and independent on dates. Have opinions on what you will do, pay your own way, provide your own transportation.
  • Be aware of alcohol and drugs. They can compromise your judgement, and the judgement of your partner.
  • If things start to get out of hand, leave, protest loudly. Don’t wait for someone else to help. If things feel uncomfortable, leave.
  • When going out with someone new, don’t feel you have to go alone. Go on a group date, go out and meet a group of friends, meet in a public place.
  • Socialize with people who share your values. If you are with someone who is more sexually permissive than you they might perceive you as sharing those values.
  • Avoid falling for lines such as “If you loved me”. If your partner loved you they would respect your feelings and wait until you are ready.
TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS.

BECOME AWARE WHEN YOU ARE IN
HIGH RISK SITUATIONS.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.